SIDS: A parent's account of her experience

In spite of much ongoing research, sudden infant death syndrome remains a mystery. There are many theories, but as yet, no conclusive explanation. In 1994, SIDS took the lives of 4,073 babies in the United States and 269 in Canada. From 1995 to 2010 SIDS took the lives of 166,000 babies in the United States and 12,000 in Canada.
Most who fall victim to this syndrome die between the second and the fourth month of life. The babies are happy and healthy when tucked into their cribs in the evening. But when the parents look in on them the next morning, they find them dead.
What makes the situation even more difficult for parents after a sudden infant death is that the police are frequently called to investigate whether the baby had been neglected or abused. A coroner’s examination may be ordered. The majority of officials behave with tact and respect, but not all of them. The overzealous police officer that came to my home on April 24^th, 2008 was not so respectful and tried to blame me for my daughter’s death. All I can remember is yelling at him and telling him to get the hell out of my house.
At 8am my daughter was alive and well. She was still asleep and so was my 5-year-old son so I went back to bed. I was awakened by a phone call from my mom at 11:11am and thought it was strange that Zenzi (that is my daughter’s name) had not woken me up. As I walked down the hallway I had a horrible feeling and knew something was wrong. She was laying on her back slightly titled to the left with the blanket a little over her face. I moved it and she was white as could be. There was blood coming out of her nose, some out of her mouth, and the left side of her face looked horrible because of where the blood had settled in and her left eye was slightly opened while her right eye was closed. It was as if she was awake, fell asleep, and just stopped breathing. Which yes that is what happened. But to this very day I replay that morning wondering what I could of did differently. My daughter had just turned 4 months old.
Parents question themselves mercilessly for possible causes of their child’s death, for what they might have done wrong. Even an outside confirmation that parent’s aren’t at fault doesn’t prevent these feelings. You may need support to deal with your guilt feelings rationally –perhaps through discussion with others who have had the same experience, by attending a support group or by seeking counseling.
Children who die of SIDS are torn out of life in the midst of the baby’s and parents’ “honeymoon” together. An exciting, joyful time has just begun, when the baby starts to make contact with her surroundings, imitates her parents and smiles at them. Love and bonding have grown deeply. On the other hand, memories of the baby’s short life span remain –memories that no one can ever take away, and this can help the grief process eventually.
I did talk to the coroner who did the autopsy on my daughter and he told me it was SIDS and there was nothing I could have done to prevent her death. They say it’s like a light turning on and off and with SIDS babies their “switch” is defective and just stops working and never turns on again. Or in other words it fails to tell them to breath. Some studies are saying it could be caused by a defective brain stem that is causing them to just stop breathing. Yet there are still no answers to the cause of SIDS or even a cure.
Since the 1990s there have been studies that say you should put your baby to sleep on their back, don’t have bumpers in the cribs, pillows, stuffed animals, or thick blankets that could cause suffocation. You should give them a pacifier at nap time and bed time. Do not smoke during pregnancy or around a baby or let anyone who smokes hold the baby while they smell of cigarette smoke. Also they say to be careful of overheating your infant. But in recent years they have found even if you do all of these things that a seemingly normal; healthy baby will still fall victim to SIDS.
My daughter was taken from us due to SIDS and she had no risk of SIDS. She was not underweight at birth. Actually she was a healthy 8lbs baby girl born at 37 weeks gestation. At her passing she weighed 27lbs and was 24 inches long. By no means was she a tiny baby. She slept with a pacifier. She did just fall asleep and never woke up. Losing a child to SIDS is beyond devastating because all the parents do is blame themselves and some blame each other.

http://hubpages.com/hub/SIDS-Sudden-Infant-Death-SyndromeMyChild

SIDS: The burden the police carry

Lauren Hooker  April 25th, 2011

“I’m sorry for your loss,” Officer Andy Hilton said as he clasped the hand of the father who had just lost his infant son.
Those five words are simple, but they bear the burden of something much deeper: a loved one is gone.
Life can be long, or it can be cut short. It can expire peacefully, or it can end abruptly in a bad car crash. For Hilton, who has been part of the Boise Police Department for five and a half years, attending to these tragedies is part of his duty.
“Tragic moments like these happen once in their lifetime,” he said. “But it’s everyday on the job for us.”
Humans are emotional creatures, and cops are no different. In order to deal with the potential psychological side effects from traumatic events, officers often emotionally detach themselves from the situation.
It begins with a call; Hilton, a part of the Crime Scene Investigation specialty unit, must then take photos, fingerprints and physical evidence are part of the job.
Concerning the tragic case of this reporter’s first few minutes shadowing a Boise police officer, Hilton had to first photograph the deceased infant at the hospital.
The child’s grandfather sat outside the pediatric trauma room, the lines around his salt-and-pepper mustache firm. As people filed in and out, he quietly buried his head in his arms.
Sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) is unexpected and silent. It occurs in infants less than one year old and yields no symptoms. By law, police and other officials on hand, such as a coroner and detectives, are required to determine the cause of death.
After photographs are taken, the next step is to examine the scene to make sure there is nothing suspicious.
Physical evidence such as medicine, blankets and baby bottles, were bagged, labeled and examined.
The house was warm, and smelled like cinnamon. The baby’s room was decorated with baseball memorabilia, and the infant’s mother sobbed quietly in the room next door as law enforcement gathered several items of evidence.
Intruding on such personal moments is routine; officers moved about with an air of solemnity and respect.
“Sir? We’re done,” Hilton said to the father with one blue-gloved hand on the door.
“Officer? Thank you for your help,” said the man, shoulders slumped.
“I’m sorry for your loss.”
“Thank you.”
Because news outlets only cover a few cases, this is the side of the BPD that people don’t often see. SIDS, suicides and abuse happen more often than many people think.
And contrary to popular belief, not all police are on a mission to issue the most speeding tickets or bust a ton of college parties.
“College kids are probably the lowest on our radar,” said Hilton, who also noted that most parties are called in by neighbors. “But loud parties disturb people, and we can’t just ignore it.”
According to Hilton, there are worse offenses in our community than underage drinking. As far as job satisfaction goes, citing a couple consumption tickets is nothing compared to arresting a child molester or burglar.
http://arbiteronline.com/2011/04/25/true-blue-the-other-side-of-the-boise-police-department/